What we think we want vs. what really makes us happy may be very different things.
Think about the time you spent day dreaming about that activity or job that you thought you really wanted. You maybe visualized what life would be like when you achieved those things. When you really got into the job, however, you discovered that it wasn’t what you visualized. Reality and fantasy are two different things.
“Well,” said Pooh, “what I like best,” and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn’t know what it was called. ~A.A. Milne
So sometimes the reality of eating the honey was OK, but it wasn’t as good as the idea of how the honey was going to taste. Some people do this with foods. Imagine the taste of some Cheetos chips. Think about the flavor, the crunchiness and feel the desire to be satisfied. However, after eating Cheetos, you may have a weird taste in your mouth, things are sticking to your teeth. And are you really satisfied? Most people aren’t, and yet here’s a bag of Cheetos. Maybe if you eat more, you’ll get the experience you thought you were going to get at the beginning. It’s not really there, it’s what you thought might be there. It’s what you hoped would be there.
Before we set our hearts too much on anything, let us examine how happy are those who already possess it. ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld
However, there’s also a balance. Some things aren’t as bad as they seem to be. Sometimes the most disgusting job you ever thought you would do ends up being the most enjoyable and memorable. Some studies have shown that a janitor has one of the most satisfactory jobs out there. It may not be a dream job for most people, but then, what is your real dream? An office or the steady salary? Or where you hoping for a sense of accomplishment in a job well done? In this, you’d go home and feel good about the work you’ve done, knowing that somewhere out there, someone else may be helped or benefit from the work you’ve done that day.
My crown is called content, a crown that seldom kings enjoy. ~William Shakespeare
Think about what really makes you happy. Gardening costs little to nothing, and can make people very happy. Reading a book can cost nothing if you borrow books from the library. Sometimes to lower the cost of things you really want to do, you have to become more creative or network to get those items, but it can be done.
Most of the things we really like to do costs very little. Most of the things we don’t like or don’t really want costs a lot more. It’s value perception. I get a lot of value from reading a book that may have cost me nothing but a few minutes of my time to pick out from the library. However, I don’t particularly care for flying. I’m not afraid of it, but it’s not totally enjoyable to me. If the plane were a private jet and I was served cookies and milk instead of peanuts, would it make being up in the air more enjoyable? I don’t think I’d go out of my way to just get on a plane. I’d rather go in the back yard and garden.
Isn’t it cool when the days that are supposed to feel good, actually do? ~Jim Carrey